Looking back, and going forward

I was sitting at my desk catching up on social media updates, emails and admin when I glanced at my diary with the realisation that it was 1st of November. Wow. I have been working on the Border Lives project for over a year.

In a cliched way, time has flown by, but actually it's quite satisfying to look back and think about how much work has been done in the past year.

When I started on 29th October last year, I was still a blonde (am now a redhead), the project had a different name and was just some text on a funding application form. Conor (Project Manager) and myself were faced with the challenge of turning this name and the objectives into a project that not only met our targets but really achieved something.

I remember creating my work plan for the first 3 months and it being absurdly over ambitious so I quickly re-drafted it to something more realistic.

My approach was always to get out there and meet people. Yes I did book research, yes I researched online and yes I visited libraries but none of that even came close to the knowledge and experience I got from meeting and talking to people.

I've met with approximately 300 people so far, not only to tell them about our project and what we hope to do but to listen to their thoughts and advice, and answer their questions (if I could). This has been the key influence in shaping our project to what it is today. I can safely sit here and say that I am very proud of how Border Lives is turning out.

Of course, we have painstakingly procured for services such as our branding and logo design, our monitoring and evaluation framework, our website design and the video production. (Conor can testify to that!) We have held information events and put our steering committee into place. We have researched and drawn up our own code of conduct and good practice. We really have worked hard.

At times developing this project has felt overwhelming but that's only because we care about it, we take pride in the project and our input into it. We want it to be of the highest quality in every aspect.

And so, what of the next nine months?

There is still A LOT of work to be done but I'll keep doing what I'm doing.

I'll keep meeting people, keep researching, keep listening, keep thinking, keep caring.

After all, Border Lives is about the participants and the people from the border region. It is about you.

I'm confident that it's this approach that has made and will continue to make Border Lives a great project.

BBC NI Radio Interview 

Visit to Raphoe, County Donegal

Border Town Exhibition in Newry

Information Event

Day of Reflection

Today has been dedicated as a 'Day of Reflection' by Healing Through Remembering.

"The Day of Reflection is a Day to reflect on our own attitudes, on what more we might have done or might still do, to acknowledge the deep hurt and pain caused by the conflict in and about Northern Ireland, and to make a personal commitment that such loss should never be allowed to happen again."

In that spirit I thought that I would reflect on some of my own personal attitudes and experiences.

I turned 30 years old earlier this year. Half of that time was lived during 'the troubles', the latter half has been lived in what we call peaceful times. However, in my opinion, these years have still been 'troubled'. I say this because I am from Omagh.

I was 15 when a bomb tore through the buildings and people of my town. I still get emotional when I think about it.

I had just returned from Atlanta, Georgia in the US a few weeks before. I had participated on the Ulster Project which sees 6 protestant and 6 catholic teens form a group and stay with host families of other backgrounds in America for four weeks. The concept was to promote peace and better understanding in young people on more neutral ground. At that point, it had been the best thing I'd ever done in my life. I had come home to Omagh having made new friends for life, a new perspective on life, hopeful for the future. Less than three weeks later, everything changed.

I remember that day like it was yesterday and I vividly remember the excruciating and emotional days after. My dad was called in to implement the towns emergency plan. I didn't see him for days except once he came home for a few hours sleep. He didn't look like himself. He later told me some of his experiences so I now know why.

Some of my other memories of the aftermath include watching the news reports and having the surreal feeling of seeing your town, yet feeling some sort of disconnect from it, like my eyes were lying to me. 

I remember the funerals, the weeks and weeks of funerals. The injuries, seeing so many people with cuts, bruises, on crutches, all patched up physically. Thinking that not enough patches, stitches or casts in the world would help mend the psychological and emotional damage.

I remember going back to school two weeks later and it being so sombre.

I remember those who died and their families.

I reflect on that time and I look at Omagh now- how it has been rebuilt, how the people supported each other and how it is strong. The scars will always be there but I am proud of the strength of the people and the town.

In 2011, Ronan Kerr, a young catholic PSNI officer from Omagh was murdered outside his home. The town hit the media headlines again. Everyone came together and took to the streets marching for peace. "Not in my Name" was the message. The people of Omagh and beyond wanted the world to know that we want a future living in peace together.

My Day of Reflection is to acknowledge the deep pain that so many have suffered, to be open and compassionate to all, and to be hopeful that the future generations can try to understand the past and work together for a peaceful future.

This is just a small part of my story and memory of the conflict here in Northern Ireland. Through the Border Lives project I am learning so much more about what happened to others. I am thankful to anyone who shares their experience because hearing, reading or watching personal stories can only help us all to empathise, to understand, to share, and to learn.